[terrible… buzen bites just a little harder when itsuki tugs on his hair - though he soothes the mark with his tongue pretty immediately after. he grins back at itsuki even as he lifts his head to slot their lips together again.
he murmurs against his mouth while his hand goes to tangle with itsuki’s interlacing their fingers and holding itsuki’s hand against the futon]
the box with the buzen pictures and all the sweet letters he wrote to buzen.
the sweet box of gay pining that now also has a bottle(s..???????????) of lube there too, he'd point but buzen has him pinned down and i think im gonna cry bc itsuki's so slutty]
[STOPASMLDFMSDLSDMF DON'T STATE THE REASONING BEHIND ITSUKI'S ACTIONS I CANT STAND IT HERE
anyway yeah he's a total bottom, i hate it here. He does prop himself up so he can watch Buzen, because i guess he's also a fcking voyeur, just admiring the lines of his body as he moves. i think about the pc where itsuki admitted to prompto that he likes watching buzen in motion and i want to cry because it's true,
he glances to the side and sees buzen's clothes in a pile on the floor, and because he's a malewife he'll lean over in an attempt to fold them (itsuki is about to bang and yet he can't resist being domestic) and then sees the sword, buzen's sword. hm.
when buzen looks back he'll see Itsuki sitting in front of his sword form, looking down at it with obvious interest in his eyes, he always sees it on Buzen's hip or in his hands, but he's never just seen it by itself,]
Do you do your own maintenance? [he heard buzen mention 'repairs room' earlier today...]
buzen will go and grab the lube from the box - i want to even pretend that he might start skimming the letters, and he might, but the more likely thing is that if itsuki wants to take a nappy after they bang then buzen will just read them then. why is he so close to illiterate.
anyway he will come back then, and drape himself on itsuki's back like he's trying to understand what's so interesting? he drops a kiss to his shoulder and hums]
Mm, yeah. I do, or Aruji does it for us if he has time... Why do you ask?
[if he started skimming right then and there then he would have seen itsuki panic so bad even though they're both naked because for some reason reading letters is more embarrassing than the act of banging,]
Yasu-kun taught me how -- back in the prism.
[he turns around so he can take Buzen by the chin and kiss him softly,]
...I asked him because I want to take care of you too. ...Can I?
[or is that something reserved for swords and masters? though even if it is... it'll just make itsuki want to take care of buzen even more,]
anyway buzen is just going to get cold at this point? so he's just. going to pick up itsuki from where he is and carry him back to the futon please can they at least have this convo under the covers]
[wow.......... itsuki's never seen buzen blush before.......................... except like 5 minutes ago during their bang............. must be nice.............]
I see.
[the way buzen is so sweetly honest and itsuki decides to respond with jealousy? THEY JUST MADE LOVE AND HIS VOICE iS SO FLAT????? HE DOESN'T SAY ANYTHING ELSE?? HE JUST TURNS AROUND???]
buzen can at least figure this much out - if itsuki is so jealous, and kissing is something that should normally left between lovers. the moment with wicked had felt strangely intimate, yes, even though buzen didn't think that it had necessarily felt romantic. it still feels like something that'd be easy to misunderstand....
which is why buzen just sighs a little bit - he lets itsuki turn around, but he's already immediately spooning him. he presses kisses to itsuki's neck, his shoulders, his upper back....]
Suki....
[he nuzzles against his hair gently]
It's not like that. I know you're unhappy... I'm sorry. I didn't mean to.
What do you want me to do? To make it clear that you're the only one I love like this?
[itsuki's upset but not only for jealous yan reasons, but because he knows he's being jealous and yan and as always, he wishes he wasn't this way. very funny because he'll always be like this no matter what,
the idea that buzen might like someone more than him doesn't even really cross his mind -- not when buzen's made it clear so many times that he loves him. it makes him feel guilty too, that buzen's trying so hard to make up for something he's not responsible for.
that buzen has to say sorry for someone else's actions... it's frustrating.
itsuki turns around so he can see his face and slide an arm around Buzen's waist,]
I'm not mad at you.
[he trails the fingers of his other hand across Buzen's face, sliding a finger down the bridge of his nose, taking him in]
...I want people to stop kissing you. Even if they don't love you as much as I do, even if it doesn't mean the same thing to them. [...] Especially if it doesn't mean the same thing to them.
I'm fine with Mete-chan -- and Shuu-kun and Yasu-kun. But anyone else... I'd like it if you didn't have to apologize for something they did.
[which he wouldn't have to do if itsuki wasn't so jealous but HERE WE ARE I GUESS]
[oh itsuki your jealousy.... though buzen can't help but think that this is probably - fair? it feels fair? to not want to have someone else kiss the person that you want to be yours....
(buzen does not feel this in the slightest. jealousy confuses him. someone could kiss itsuki in front of him and buzen would just be unhappy that itsuki wasn't asked permission first.)
so he holds still for itsuki to hold onto him and touch him, though he does turn his head ever so slightly just so that he can kiss itsuki's finger that tracing the line of his face.]
Okay.
[so easily, okay. buzen will shift so that he can hover on top of itsuki now, rolling them gently. just so that he can frame itsuki's head with his arms, leaning down to press another kiss to itsuki's mouth. one that the both of them understand so easily, full of love and affection and - hopefully, buzen thinks - romance.]
Then I won't let anyone else kiss me - only you, and the ones you allow. But even then... you're the only one I want to kiss like this, and the only one I want these kinds of kisses from.
[buzen kisses him sweetly, with what feels like romance, and for a moment itsuki can only think of how much he wants him. he wants to hold him and kiss him and know that buzen will only ever belong to him. buzen says 'i'm yours' and itsuki thinks for one wild, dark moment that he wishes he could show the whole world that.
he can feel the power in his chest, the one kazuha gave him. 'a power to grant happiness to others'. and yet. what would it be like if he could just put the entire world to sleep? if he could make them live somewhere where they could never reach buzen and him?
(...they could all still be happy, wouldn't they? they just wouldn't know.
...)
no. he doesn't want that. he'll never be the only person buzen loves, and separating him from everyone he does care for isn't the answer.
that wouldn't be loving buzen. that would be breaking him.
his lips twitch, and he puts a hand over his face -- as if hoping that the ugliness in his thoughts aren't reflected in his expression. buzen accepts everything about him -- he doesn't want that to change. (and a part of him too, is afraid that he'll accept this.)]
[if you separated buzen from his gous and put them in a dream coma buzen would simply start a boycott on kisses that wouldn't stop until they were freed from the dream that's just how it is. and then he'd continue with life as normal once itsuki is taught that he can't do that.
no putting people he loves in dream comas, like a misbehaving puppy.
that said buzen tilts his head when itsuki covers his face with his hand... and leans down to kiss the center of his palm anyway. mwah.]
... kiss? Oh - you mean...
[the sword...]
... right now?
[he says this but - he does shift his weight so that he can balance on one arm, the other already reaching out to grab his sword form..... he has nothing really against it, if it'd make itsuki feel better]
[imagine if buzen said no because he just wants to bang and itsuki started crying bc he'd think buzen was saying no to him, imagine that happened
his palm feels tingly from where buzen kissed it... itsuki thinks yet again about the claim buzen has on his heart. he should probably move to sit up to accept the sword, but he doesn't. instead he holds his hands out for the sword, still lying on the futon]
Can you help me carry it? ...I don't want to drop you.
[yea buzen got the lube for no reason at this point it's so funny]
Hah, I guess we swords can be surprisingly heavy to humans.
[even though buzen hardly feels that way. even if this form wasn't built this way, muscles and all, he wonders if it could ever feel heavy to carry himself. but he'll use his thumb to guide the sheath off, keeping it still close to the futon, but his blade will become bare between them.
his vessel, the truest form of himself.
it does feel its own kind of intimate, admittedly.]
Keep one hand by the hilt, be careful with the blade.
[just. basic advice, just in case. but he won't truly let go of himself if itsuki wants the help of getting used to the weight? imagine how bad it'd be if he accidentally cut himself on buzen's sword that'd be so sad]
anyway he'll carefully accept the sword, putting one hand on the hilt and the other on the blade, careful. imagine if he did cut himself and a knifeplay kink awoke in him
it helps that buzen's holding on too, the sword doesn't feel as heavy as he expected. maybe a little heavier, considering that he's holding it up -- fighting against gravity.
...it's so close. just a few inches lower, and it'd be hovering over his neck... he feels his pulse kick up with adrenaline, but he's not afraid. how can he be, when buzen's here? he moves his hand down the hilt a little so he can touch buzen's hand, as if the warmth will remind him that he's not alone.]
...I know you've been held before. But you're the first one I've ever held.
[itsuki took buzen's first kiss, his first moment of intimacy. (and he has the gall to get jealous) shouldn't buzen take more of itsuki's firsts too? he gently tugs the blade down until it's hovering just over his lips, and kisses it softly.]
The only one too.
[though technically he could probably carry another sword... if out of necessity, but never by choice. he shifts his head a little, leans up to kiss the blade again,]
You said that you're mine. [this time he moves the blade to the side, so he can kiss the next part,] That means I'm yours too.
[down, down, down, so he can kiss every part of the blade, his eyes fixed on buzen's]
I'm not a warrior. I don't need to be one. [he doesn't want to be anyone else, because buzen's told him he loves him] I love you, Buzen Gou. Every form of you.
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he's not so lost in the sensation that he can't flash Buzen a smile, running a hand through his hair and tugging on it playfully,]
Are you sure? You're a hard act to follow, you know...
[itsuki says like he's not a bottom]
[1/2]
he murmurs against his mouth while his hand goes to tangle with itsuki’s interlacing their fingers and holding itsuki’s hand against the futon]
Everything you do is my favorite.
[so he prefers it, if it’s itsuki.]
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Where did you put the… slippery?
[the LUBE itsuki]
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[he means
the box with the buzen pictures and all the sweet letters he wrote to buzen.
the sweet box of gay pining that now also has a bottle(s..???????????) of lube there too, he'd point but buzen has him pinned down and i think im gonna cry bc itsuki's so slutty]
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but buzen is just laughing a little at that, amused as he presses another kiss to itsuki's forehead]
Alright, hold on.
[THE WAY THAT BUZEN IS JUST GETTING UP TO GET THIS LUBE BECAUSE IT SEEMS LIKE ITSUKI IS ALREADY DONE TOPPING I CAN'T]
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anyway yeah he's a total bottom, i hate it here. He does prop himself up so he can watch Buzen, because i guess he's also a fcking voyeur, just admiring the lines of his body as he moves. i think about the pc where itsuki admitted to prompto that he likes watching buzen in motion and i want to cry because it's true,
he glances to the side and sees buzen's clothes in a pile on the floor, and because he's a malewife he'll lean over in an attempt to fold them (itsuki is about to bang and yet he can't resist being domestic) and then sees the sword, buzen's sword. hm.
when buzen looks back he'll see Itsuki sitting in front of his sword form, looking down at it with obvious interest in his eyes, he always sees it on Buzen's hip or in his hands, but he's never just seen it by itself,]
Do you do your own maintenance? [he heard buzen mention 'repairs room' earlier today...]
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buzen will go and grab the lube from the box - i want to even pretend that he might start skimming the letters, and he might, but the more likely thing is that if itsuki wants to take a nappy after they bang then buzen will just read them then. why is he so close to illiterate.
anyway he will come back then, and drape himself on itsuki's back like he's trying to understand what's so interesting? he drops a kiss to his shoulder and hums]
Mm, yeah. I do, or Aruji does it for us if he has time... Why do you ask?
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Yasu-kun taught me how -- back in the prism.
[he turns around so he can take Buzen by the chin and kiss him softly,]
...I asked him because I want to take care of you too. ...Can I?
[or is that something reserved for swords and masters? though even if it is... it'll just make itsuki want to take care of buzen even more,]
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... well, if you want to. Maybe tomorrow then.
[they are so naked right now]
I guess I forgot that you haven't gotten a chance to hold me before... It's only been Wiku, really.
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AND YET]
...Wiku? [WIKU? WITHOUT THE -CHAN?] She held you?
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[just. yeah??????
anyway buzen is just going to get cold at this point? so he's just. going to pick up itsuki from where he is and carry him back to the futon please can they at least have this convo under the covers]
She asked.
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they're under the covers now... he cuddles close even though he's being so irrationally jealous now,]
Did she just hold you or did she take care of you?
[1/2]
but buzen has no idea what's happening here. he tilts his head even as he gives itsuki another kiss, wrapping his arms around him?]
She mostly just held me... we were talking and -
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help.
he
blushes?]
.... she kissed me, I guess....
1/2
he's.................................. blushing...........]
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I see.
[the way buzen is so sweetly honest and itsuki decides to respond with jealousy? THEY JUST MADE LOVE AND HIS VOICE iS SO FLAT????? HE DOESN'T SAY ANYTHING ELSE?? HE JUST TURNS AROUND???]
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buzen can at least figure this much out - if itsuki is so jealous, and kissing is something that should normally left between lovers. the moment with wicked had felt strangely intimate, yes, even though buzen didn't think that it had necessarily felt romantic. it still feels like something that'd be easy to misunderstand....
which is why buzen just sighs a little bit - he lets itsuki turn around, but he's already immediately spooning him. he presses kisses to itsuki's neck, his shoulders, his upper back....]
Suki....
[he nuzzles against his hair gently]
It's not like that. I know you're unhappy... I'm sorry. I didn't mean to.
What do you want me to do? To make it clear that you're the only one I love like this?
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the idea that buzen might like someone more than him doesn't even really cross his mind -- not when buzen's made it clear so many times that he loves him. it makes him feel guilty too, that buzen's trying so hard to make up for something he's not responsible for.
that buzen has to say sorry for someone else's actions... it's frustrating.
itsuki turns around so he can see his face and slide an arm around Buzen's waist,]
I'm not mad at you.
[he trails the fingers of his other hand across Buzen's face, sliding a finger down the bridge of his nose, taking him in]
...I want people to stop kissing you. Even if they don't love you as much as I do, even if it doesn't mean the same thing to them. [...] Especially if it doesn't mean the same thing to them.
I'm fine with Mete-chan -- and Shuu-kun and Yasu-kun. But anyone else... I'd like it if you didn't have to apologize for something they did.
[which he wouldn't have to do if itsuki wasn't so jealous but HERE WE ARE I GUESS]
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(buzen does not feel this in the slightest. jealousy confuses him. someone could kiss itsuki in front of him and buzen would just be unhappy that itsuki wasn't asked permission first.)
so he holds still for itsuki to hold onto him and touch him, though he does turn his head ever so slightly just so that he can kiss itsuki's finger that tracing the line of his face.]
Okay.
[so easily, okay. buzen will shift so that he can hover on top of itsuki now, rolling them gently. just so that he can frame itsuki's head with his arms, leaning down to press another kiss to itsuki's mouth. one that the both of them understand so easily, full of love and affection and - hopefully, buzen thinks - romance.]
Then I won't let anyone else kiss me - only you, and the ones you allow. But even then... you're the only one I want to kiss like this, and the only one I want these kinds of kisses from.
I'm yours.
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he can feel the power in his chest, the one kazuha gave him. 'a power to grant happiness to others'. and yet. what would it be like if he could just put the entire world to sleep? if he could make them live somewhere where they could never reach buzen and him?
(...they could all still be happy, wouldn't they? they just wouldn't know.
...)
no. he doesn't want that. he'll never be the only person buzen loves, and separating him from everyone he does care for isn't the answer.
that wouldn't be loving buzen. that would be breaking him.
his lips twitch, and he puts a hand over his face -- as if hoping that the ugliness in his thoughts aren't reflected in his expression. buzen accepts everything about him -- he doesn't want that to change. (and a part of him too, is afraid that he'll accept this.)]
...Can I kiss you?
[he means
the sword
help]
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no putting people he loves in dream comas, like a misbehaving puppy.
that said buzen tilts his head when itsuki covers his face with his hand... and leans down to kiss the center of his palm anyway. mwah.]
... kiss? Oh - you mean...
[the sword...]
... right now?
[he says this but - he does shift his weight so that he can balance on one arm, the other already reaching out to grab his sword form..... he has nothing really against it, if it'd make itsuki feel better]
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his palm feels tingly from where buzen kissed it... itsuki thinks yet again about the claim buzen has on his heart. he should probably move to sit up to accept the sword, but he doesn't. instead he holds his hands out for the sword, still lying on the futon]
Can you help me carry it? ...I don't want to drop you.
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Hah, I guess we swords can be surprisingly heavy to humans.
[even though buzen hardly feels that way. even if this form wasn't built this way, muscles and all, he wonders if it could ever feel heavy to carry himself. but he'll use his thumb to guide the sheath off, keeping it still close to the futon, but his blade will become bare between them.
his vessel, the truest form of himself.
it does feel its own kind of intimate, admittedly.]
Keep one hand by the hilt, be careful with the blade.
[just. basic advice, just in case. but he won't truly let go of himself if itsuki wants the help of getting used to the weight? imagine how bad it'd be if he accidentally cut himself on buzen's sword that'd be so sad]
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anyway he'll carefully accept the sword, putting one hand on the hilt and the other on the blade, careful. imagine if he did cut himself and a knifeplay kink awoke in him
it helps that buzen's holding on too, the sword doesn't feel as heavy as he expected. maybe a little heavier, considering that he's holding it up -- fighting against gravity.
...it's so close. just a few inches lower, and it'd be hovering over his neck... he feels his pulse kick up with adrenaline, but he's not afraid. how can he be, when buzen's here? he moves his hand down the hilt a little so he can touch buzen's hand, as if the warmth will remind him that he's not alone.]
...I know you've been held before. But you're the first one I've ever held.
[itsuki took buzen's first kiss, his first moment of intimacy. (and he has the gall to get jealous) shouldn't buzen take more of itsuki's firsts too? he gently tugs the blade down until it's hovering just over his lips, and kisses it softly.]
The only one too.
[though technically he could probably carry another sword... if out of necessity, but never by choice. he shifts his head a little, leans up to kiss the blade again,]
You said that you're mine. [this time he moves the blade to the side, so he can kiss the next part,] That means I'm yours too.
[down, down, down, so he can kiss every part of the blade, his eyes fixed on buzen's]
I'm not a warrior. I don't need to be one. [he doesn't want to be anyone else, because buzen's told him he loves him] I love you, Buzen Gou. Every form of you.
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